Monday, November 05, 2007

Born again eh?

It's really hard for me to relate to religious extremists. The only thing I'm extreme about is being tolerant. A person's religious beliefs, or lack of religious beliefs, is no more or less important to me than the pigmentation of their hair, eyes or epidermis. A couple of times I've had this mental flash of standing in line as a bodiless soul, with a large group of bodiless souls, in front of the fabled pearly gates while a fellow who looks like a cross between an Army drill sergeant and an angel is saying "You have the right to remain apostate. Nothing you say will make a difference. You have the right to a messiah. If you cannot select a messiah one will be appointed by the Deity." I suppose some folks might find this to be a frightening thought but I'm a veteran. I can stand in one more line as many times as it takes. No big deal.

Let's see, where was I? Oh yeah, I was talking about religious extremists. This morning one of our neighbors made a comment about a mutual acquaintance being a "Born Again Christian" and before I could stop myself I commented "Ooh, that's gotta hurt!".

Don't get me wrong here, I don't mean to imply that everyone who considers themselves to have been "Born Again" is an extremist but it's certainly true that a fair number of them are and it's equally true that, for the rest of my life, any time someone tells me they're a "Born Again Christian" I'm going to have to bite my tongue.

When I hear a funny one-liner or short commentary it's really hard for me to avoid using it at inappropriate moments and it's even more difficult when it came from my own dubious gray matter.

Here's an example from someone else "Jesus loves me but he can't stand you". I don't know who wrote it, but I love it. I can't think of another sentence I've worked so hard to resist repeating. If you repeat it, remember, you've got to use a whiny, facetious voice, ok?

Lisa says I'll probably get death threats for posting this but I figure most people are smart enough to see the difference between a little ribbing and being hateful. I'm not hateful, I don't have it in me. Am I religious? Yes, sorta. Can we discuss it? No.

Nuff said.